http://www.parham.org/2008/11/29/what-to-do-when-you-have-a-kid-with-down-syndrome Thoughts on Down syndrome, life, and other stuff Mon, 04 Jan 2010 15:32:02 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 http://www.parham.org/2008/11/29/what-to-do-when-you-have-a-kid-with-down-syndrome/comment-page-1#comment-7772 cparham Sun, 22 Feb 2009 02:32:59 +0000 http://www.parham.org/?p=288#comment-7772 My son Cyrus was born 19 years ago. I was a confused and devastated 22 year old mother who had been expecting a "normal" baby. A well meaning person said it would be okay, spouting that having a child with Downs was like planning a trip to Germany, but when you exit the plane you find yourself in Holland. At the time I found that explanation not helpful at all. Looking back, I wish I had enjoyed my son more as he grew up, rather than hoping and expecting more of him and myself. Now, I simply enjoy his presence, compassion, and humor. I would never trade him for that "normal" baby I had expected. We worked hard with early childhood intervention classes, graduating to special eductation preschool at three years old. Now,Cyrus is in high school, and I have to stop wondering about the if only's. If only I had read to him more, tried harder,spent more time, done all the right things, then he would be more normal, less mentally retarded, and more functional. My advice is to avoid that kind of thinking and just enjoy your new baby with Downs. Yes work hard, spend lots of time, but realize every child has a potential and accept them just as you accept your "normal" children in their abilities. My son is a beautiful human being with remarkable qualities. He is empathetic, kind, easy going, and funny. He knows how to live in the momment. That is what he is teaching me to do. My son Cyrus was born 19 years ago. I was a confused and devastated 22 year old mother who had been expecting a “normal” baby. A well meaning person said it would be okay, spouting that having a child with Downs was like planning a trip to Germany, but when you exit the plane you find yourself in Holland. At the time I found that explanation not helpful at all. Looking back, I wish I had enjoyed my son more as he grew up, rather than hoping and expecting more of him and myself. Now, I simply enjoy his presence, compassion, and humor. I would never trade him for that “normal” baby I had expected. We worked hard with early childhood intervention classes, graduating to special eductation preschool at three years old. Now,Cyrus is in high school, and I have to stop wondering about the if only’s. If only I had read to him more, tried harder,spent more time, done all the right things, then he would be more normal, less mentally retarded, and more functional. My advice is to avoid that kind of thinking and just enjoy your new baby with Downs. Yes work hard, spend lots of time, but realize every child has a potential and accept them just as you accept your “normal” children in their abilities. My son is a beautiful human being with remarkable qualities. He is empathetic, kind, easy going, and funny. He knows how to live in the momment. That is what he is teaching me to do.

]]> http://www.parham.org/2008/11/29/what-to-do-when-you-have-a-kid-with-down-syndrome/comment-page-1#comment-7766 Amy Mon, 01 Dec 2008 03:45:16 +0000 http://www.parham.org/?p=288#comment-7766 As always, amazingly put Sean! I am constantly reminded about how much I have to celebrate with Ava in my life. She makes me, Sean, Reid and everyone else in her life a better person. Here's to exciting new horizons ahead. As always, amazingly put Sean! I am constantly reminded about how much I have to celebrate with Ava in my life. She makes me, Sean, Reid and everyone else in her life a better person. Here’s to exciting new horizons ahead.

]]> http://www.parham.org/2008/11/29/what-to-do-when-you-have-a-kid-with-down-syndrome/comment-page-1#comment-7765 Diane Sun, 30 Nov 2008 01:38:03 +0000 http://www.parham.org/?p=288#comment-7765 Good advice - well said. You might want to include grandparents in there somewhere. We want to do all we can to help when we can. We can start with the things on the list - thanks for the reminder. Good advice – well said. You might want to include grandparents in there somewhere. We want to do all we can to help when we can. We can start with the things on the list – thanks for the reminder.

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